So unless you’ve died or were stuck in your house wathing an 84-hour Monk marathon, you know about apple’s new iPhone. I’ve been anticipating an ipod phone for three years now and as a loyal apple user, you’d expect I’d be pretty enthusiastic about it. You were wrong! What a fucking let down. Here’s why.
1. Apple sold us out to go after PC-using corporate America. This phone wasn’t designed for me, a post-college 20-something with we’ll say, no disposable income. It was made for rich, white, guys who work downtown for companies with three names in the title. Johnson, Durkett and Greene. People who’s companies will buy them new PDA’s. People who are using PC based smart phones. What about your professional creative, loyal apple users, fuckers?! Where is our ipod phone for $300? We don’t want internet and email for $599. We just want to have a phone that plays our music.
2. Apple has the marketing guru team of the century. Apple voluntarily changed their iTV product to appleTV once they found out that some small electronics company already had a product out called eyeTV.
Now Apple is having a claim filed against them by Cisco systems for a trademark breech. Cisco already has a product called the iPhone. Why would Apple buckle from some tiny company, but want to go head-to-head againt Cisco, the giant of all giants? Especially after they have already shown that they are willing to break the “i____” product line and introduce products as an “apple____”? Because they want to get sued.
That’s right, you heard me. Apple is not releasing the iPhone until June. That gives them 5 months to get sued, have every media and press source write a story about the iPhone, and then settle with Cisco by either cutting them a big fat check, or just changing the name to the applePhone. And on the way, they get to make sure that everyone and their mother knows all about the iPhone. Apple you saucy minx. You got us good.
3. The touch pad seems like a stupid gimmic. Every iPod screen gets the shit scratched out of it. What’s going to happen to this screen when it’s getting picked at all day? It’s going to be covered with grease and get scratched up. But we’ll see. In the next couple months, prototypes will be getting out and I’m excited to read the reviews. We’ll see apple. We’ll see.
